Ask The Mountie
The trusty Mountie answers your questions:
The Mountie might answer you straight away, or he might go away and ponder for a while, but he always replies with the profound wisdom one can only truly expect from a Mountie
The most recent Questions:
- What does the phrase "proud of the ground" mean?
- What's the correct name for your high brown boots?
- Should I Tell Her Or Just Lez Be Friends?
- Why is Good Friday called Good Friday?
- What does it mean when he doesn't call back?
- Is it true that you can have oral sex with a anteater?
- Mountie, are you homosexual?
- I find cyber sex to be a painful experience
- What am I doing now?
- Which Super-hero would you send to stop a meteor shower?
- What would you do if a bald Irishman tried to sell you a stolen swan in the month of May?
- how did you become so damn knowledgable?
- Is the hokey pokey really what its all about?
- What would happen to a blowfish in outer space?
- Did Michael Landon have childern and where was burry at?
- I am absess with caucasion male feet
- Are mothers better than fathers?
- How do I get the stain out?
- I am afraid to ask her
- In four words,what is life?
- How do you draw people because I am really stuck?
- How can i find a girlfriend?
- Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
- What is the path to enlightenment?
- What is my name?
- Why did cargo pants become so popular?
- how do you spell length?
- How do I know if I'm gay?
- Why am I an hour late?
- Please can you help me with my A-levels
- I am absess with caucasion male feet
- Smart and single?
- Which do you like better: chocolate or vanilla?
- Will Bob Freeman ever be famous?
- Can horses kiss donkeys?
- Are my parents now my birth parents?
- Can you get my daughter on Letterman?
- Why do riders generally mount from the left ?
- How do you pronounce Arachibutyrophobia?
- What is a mountain oyster?
- why am i feeling this way?
- Give me why man is better than woman
- Will I ever get my website finished?
- Where did the phrase da bomb come from?
- How can we unite the population?
- What else can i use to become luky
- Why do we live in the Milky Way?
- How come the Mounties at Buckingham Palace are not mounted in anything?
- l think my wife has been abducted by aliens?
- Is my boss lying?
- Why am I up all night reading other peoples questions?
- What does the word 'takete' mean?
- What is your favorite breakfast food?
- Why is there air?
- how do you tell a child about growing old?
- Why is there no verb to denote that we are telling the truth?
- Is the mounted police adequately prepared in case zombies attack Canada?
- Will michael ever fall in love with me?
- What causes bigger foreheads?
- Why does lint collect in my belly button?
- How do i (an American Female) become a mountie?
- What is the absorption rate of a dry sponge?
- Why do my Canadian men lack size?
- What is the most ruthlessly efficient way?
- Do you have anything easier?
- Where do hippies come from?
- Are flip flops very popular in your Town or your Country?
- Where do I go on the internet?
- I want to take a lead and mature with woman
- How do you spell bologne?
- How much does our lecturer cost to give us a first?
- Do mounties have to work rotating shifts?
- what's my name?
- Why are you called Mounties?
- I'm sexy?
- What's the correct name for your high brown boots?
- How do we let my annoying friend down easily?
- How many transexuals have penis?
- Why is my boss a git?
- What are your thoughts on Spandex?
- Have you ever seen Santa Claus in the far north?
- Please tell me where my hairpin is
- Are you ever subjected to the "doppler effect" while horse-riding on duty?
- What's the average amount of toilet paper?
- What your favorite TV show??
- Is it normal, my attraction to male feet?
- How big is the biggest dog in the world?
- What is the name for a term such as 'take a mulligan'
- What's the easiest way to get a girl to like you?
- Boxers or Briefs?
- Is "Sexual Beauties" Curt's favorite website?
- Is it true - If you don't know - don't ask ?
- How are homosexuals made?
- How can I avoid a holiday with my wife and child?
- IS THE WORLD COMNG TO THE END
- What is the meaning of life?
- What is the first horror novel?
- What is the best way to win a woman's heart?
- How can I make my partner cum many times?
- What's the most common forename?
- How to spend $75 at the Oftalmological museum of Zimbawe?
- Is the quality of mercy strained?
- How did I get to be left-handed
- I've got too many hours on my timetable
- How to become lucky magically?
- Bring me my bow of burning gold!
- why is my penis hard when i see a pretty girl?
- Who's the worlds heaviest dog?
- Will Kathy ever marry me?
- Why do birds suddenly appear?
- Do you mount from the side or by coming up running from the rear?
- Why are mounties so sombre in appearance and demeanour?
- Why was my girlfriend fine in the morning?
- Is it true that Condi Rice says "Hello girls" when she enters The White House?
- Will I die of muscle wastage and the like?
- What is a mountie?
- Can a shark really leap out the water like in Jaws?
- I'm a fan
- Would you rather frolic naked through a virgin meadow or feast unendingly on the most succulent bagels in the land forever?
- Eye contact - pro or con...
- What is the likelihood of me becoming a Mountie
- What is a question you always wished someone would ask?
- What am i doing here?
- Are you on drugs when you answer the questions?
- Will I pass statics?
- Where is your goat, Batisse IX?
- Why do all women suck at giving hand jobs?
- What about those tight fitting black pants and those mustaches?
- HEY SUP
- Does canada accept political refugees from the usa? Bush is Stalin
- Who will win the U.S. Presidential Election?
- Do I have a legal case against Shreddies?
- do we feel lucky?
- How do you get the Sap from the Maple Tree?
- How often do you update this site?
- Is there a darker side to Canada?
- Is it OK to marry a Mountie?
- Why does a white plastic fork look like a satellite dish?
- Is the USA idiotization a dangerous thing?
- Who's the guy that tells us to wear red and pink this summer?
- How can I get my question on Letterman?
- How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
- do you use a mac or window?
- Why are there more blondes in Queensland than Victoria?
- Do you know the way to San Jose?
- do you a girlfriend?
- How much did the first light bulb cost?
- What is your opinion on the very bad reputation of your Canadian Mounted Police?
- What is the name of superman's dog.
- Why are the French so much more annoying than your average people?
- How can i get my girl to bring home a friend for a threesome?
- What about the bug under my slipper...
- How did Caravaggio die
- Is it true the USA once attacked Canada?
- Why have American yogurt companies reduced the size of the yogurt container?
- Should i dump my boyfriend and go for my friend
- Is this automated or no?
- Why won't the United States annex Canada, even if militarily?
- How can I confront my crush that I like him?
- What is the consequences of population expolotion on the world?
- How many kjs, and how much fat is in a walnut whip???
- I was interested in the mountie of history. I hope you can help me.
- Where did you get your infamous knowledge from and how can i achieve it as well?
- How can I get pesky blood stains out of clothes?
- Where is my car?
- Why aren't there any hula dancers in Canada?
- What is this thing happening to me???
- Whats the difference between the fart and the shit?
- why?
- Shall I move to Canada from England?
- Which do you prefer, slinkies or koosh balls?
- Dear customer service
- How come mister wolf always new what time it was?
- Where can I get more info on the Apparatus for Crushing Hafnium Crystal Bar Using Cryogenic Refrigerant Neon
- I have been seeing a girl for close to 6 months now but have yet to meet her mother. Do you suspect foul play?
- What was the biggest width of a dog's head ever recorded?
- can horses talk to donkeys?
- Where do hippies come from?
- How do you pronounce the word "arachibutyrophobia"?
- how do you draw?
- Is it true that the moon has an effect on people?
- Why do some people have foot fetishes...?
- How can I keep my bat faced boss from coming around me and bothering me?
- Why aren't there any realistic reality tv shows
- has anybody ever died from smoking marijuana?
- what 2 Western countries have the most dogs
- When was Michael Landon born and what year did he die?
- What is the meaning of the Norwegian name Tonje?
- How long do lampost bulbs in Central Park last?
- Why do we only ever see one face of the moon?
- How can you forget a phone number?
- What do rockbands do with tampons?
- Am I better to go for the one eye or two eye binocular?
- Why are my pants getting shorter?
- For God's sake - how many pecks of pickled pepper DID Peter Piper pick?
- am I totally wrong to ask my fiance not to have a bachellor party?
- why is Leonardo Da Vinci's sketch called "Vitruvian Man"?
- Why does the moon look big at the horizon, but small up in the sky?
- Why are we experiening a global reccession?
- Is it true that ones tastebuds change every few years
- How does one balance time and money - is there a formula?
- How long will it be until you answer this question?
- Is maple syrup really made from maple leaves?
- Why do people wear flip-flops on the subway?
- Why did they name egypt like that?
- What country is the oldest.
- What is the most effective way to market my web site?
- Which is better, a chicken or turkey?
- Why do some lesbians prefer butch looking women?
- Why do some girls observe the '3 day rule'
- What is the correct mix of washing up liquid to water to get a good bubble blowing fluid?
- if a man speaks in a forest and no woman is there to contradict him...
- What's up with the banana? Is it from outter space?
- How is a pile fabric produced?
- I'm trying to find a listing of elvis jumpsuit manufacturers, can you help?
- why do people like or dislike the taste or consistency of certain foods?
- Which Is Better? Mac or PC?
- Is it true that a woman knows how to pleasure another woman better than a man?
- Should we hold Osborns stag do on 9th August or 16th August?
- Is it true that the living today outnumber the dead?
- Do you put out? Can I see a picture of you?
- Are there any other uses for licorace besides eating it?
- Please tell me, where do babies come from?
- How do you pronounce tapir?
- Could you explain why Little House on the Prairie had a clown as rapist episode?
- Could God make a hypothetical question even he couldn't answer?
- If we cant smoke marajuana is it okay to bake it into brownies?
- Where did the phrase "Da bomb" come from? Who started this, yo?
- Where can I get a hold of a Service Manual for an Epson c60?
- Which is better? Palm OS or PocketPC devices?
- What is the heaviest dog on record?
- When i think of the 80's the first thing to pop in my head is Molly Ringwald. What do you think of?
- What were the odds that a guy named Lou Gehrig caught a disease called "Lou Gehrig's Disease"?
- How did you get your job? Does it pay well? Are they looking for anyone?
- Why do you have to write the city & state AND the zip code on your mail?
- Where is somewhere over the rainbow?
- Is it true that fast food places drop every piece of food on the floor, and then give it to poor innocent unsuspecting customers?
- How come all the people in my area die in alphabetical order
- What is the average word count for a full lenght novel?
- I have just moved from NYC to San Diego, why can't they just be happy for me?
- Could you please tell me how to get to 'la-la land' for a short break?
- *Why* do you pronounce Takete?
- Why do people stop at the top of the stirs and block the way for all others?
- How do you pronounce takete?
- I saw a completely black squirrel today. Is this a sign of the coming apocalypse?
- Have Walnut Whips and Curly Wurlies got smaller over the years?
- Are there more people named Olson or Olsen in the world?
- Why is it that every time a new car is introduced I'm enthusiastic about it?
- Why not skip Life and go straight to heaven after Birth?
- I am a troubled designer, what should I do?
- How come you're so wise, Mountie?
- Without getting religious on me, is there an afterlife?
- Why do some people suffer from "Stigmata" phenonemon?
- If we really did go to the moon, why can't they show us the LEM?
- Why do mothers make better parents than fathers?
- Why do people refer machines, country and objects as feminine?
- Is Pluto a planet or a moon?
- DO YOU KNOW WHAT WEFT KNIT PILE FABRIC
- What is the biggest mythical beast? And what is it's name & characteristics.
- Why is the universe is flat? and not spherical?
- I have an uncle who swears by the insulating qualities of his seaweed vest
- I seem to have accidentally folded time. Please Help.
- Why are most tennis-balls yellow?
- Could you tell me at what temperature sand becomes glass?
- Please can you tell me why Pennsylvania is know as The Keystone State.
- Chinese proverb "there is not cure/medicine for the DUMB." Is this true?
- What is the most effective way to kill and avoid mosquito bites?
- Whats the average number of feathers a sparrow has on each wing?
- How many drinks does it take to 'turn' a cute straight lad gay for a few hours?
- Which is better, pepsi or coke?
- Is it true that the elephant is the only animal with four (count 'em) knees?
- How many shareholders do the hilton group have and what is a recent share price?
- Oh mountie.... what is love ?
- Does the human soul exist or is it a Darwinian self delusion ?
- I am looking for a evergreen tree, suitable for Hong Kong's sub-tropical climate and has red-orange leaves.
- I want to run All New World of Lemmings on my 1ghz PC
- What is the biggest structure ever built from 'Lego' bricks? How big was it? What was it? And who built it?
- Why are the stars in the sky so far apart?
- My mother says if I loose a tooth the 'Tooth Fairy' would lift my pillow and exchange the said extraction with coinage!